“Everywhere I go I see people passing by. They keep staring back at me like some freak in paradise.” –Papa Roach–
Sometimes I forget where I am.
Especially in the middle of the night.
The transition from one home, to the current home happened so fast, and was a blur from beginning to end, at times I get lost in the house when I need to go to the bathroom or grab a drink out of the fridge. I still reach for the wall hook for the leash to take my dog out, then, I remember where it is, and turn around to face the opposite wall.
I can’t recall the number of times now I’ve opened the lower cupboard to throw out my trash, and had forgotten the can was elsewhere. I have to stop and laugh at myself each time I drop to my haunches and remove an empty wrapper from my frying pan. We’ve been residing here since July 12th, and I’m still a bit turned around. Like wandering aimlessly in a vivid dream, wondering if it’s real or not.
Talking with Nancy last night, we both had a laugh that despite the fact we’ve landed here, it still feels a little surreal. A dream state. Neither of us have had a chance to really take it in. We don’t give ourselves a moment to close our eyes, breathe deep and say, “wow… we did it. Regardless of how it happened… we did it.”
That’s where I am in this leg of the life journey. Regardless of how it happened; despite the twists and turns, the dead-ends, the illusions, the doubt, the negative energy permeating the ether and poisoning the world, somehow… we pulled it off. Ultimately, that’s what matters. 2020 has been a fantastic year thus far, and if I maintain course and speed, it should get better as the year ends.
And I couldn’t have done it without the team. The tribe. My support. Each individual member of the inner ring had a small role in helping us achieve our goal(s). They may not even know of their importance within the process, but regardless, they had a part to play.
I had to take a risk in my life, and the team was there to back my call, and provide support when it was needed. Without that support… the outcome could’ve been quite different. I’ve never been much of a risk taker. Up until recently I’ve always preferred routine, comfort, easy and “normal”. Complacency. Knowing exactly what the next day will bring.
When we think about taking risks… there’s always a chance we may lose it all.
Can’t have that. Why risk anything on a hunch or an idea? Foolish, foolish, foolish. Snap back to reality.
I’ve found having a team really helps. And over the last few months, my team has expanded. The tribe is growing.
When it comes to writing a book, one has to be a little crazy.
At first… we’re all alone, on an island. Trapped inside our heads wondering if escape is possible. Pacing back and forth, talking to ourselves, chewing the side of a fingernail. Shooing away the unnecessary thoughts as if they were a pesky insect. Drawing images, doodles, and writing notations in the sand, then wiping them away and starting over. Staring at shapes, inanimate objects, and clouds, and becoming lost in our minds.
At least, that’s how it was for me. I was all alone on an island in the middle of nowhere, trapped in my imagination.
Writing a novel is a lonely excursion, time consuming, and fully immersive.
But, when we stumble across the right team, who wants nothing more than to hear about the adventures on the lonely island, and then offer help for escape, makes the loneliness, craziness, and hardship worth it. The ones who say, “that’s a great story. Let me help you get it to the end.”
I was terrified to ask for help. I felt a need to try and escape the island alone. By far, my largest hurdle and close to my biggest mistake ever made.
I believe I finally found the team. The “Dream team”.
I had to take a different risk, and now, my tribe is growing. The inner ring is more populated. With a team and a tribe who truly believes in us, anything can be accomplished.
I wrote a companion story about a year ago. A free read to be released on the same day as the debut novel (if the timing is perfect, and I can’t see a reason why it won’t be). The edit for the companion story will be roughly mid-August. It’s a short read compared to the novel, roughly 26,000 words, but takes place in the same universe and highlights familiar characters. I had a ton of fun creating it, but decided it needed an edit before I felt comfortable releasing it to the public. I’m doing some self-edits on it today, and tackling what I can before sending it away to a team member.
I’ll be reconnecting with my artist to see about some simple cover art for the companion, when that moment arrives. So… still a little time before everything is finalized. I can’t wait to do a cover reveal for the novel. I anticipate that moment more than anyone can possibly fathom.
In the meantime, I continue to try and make the new house a home. It’s been hot and humid, so outside work activities have been put on hold. I prefer cooler weather when laboring outdoors.
I’ll continue to keep everyone posted with updates, here, as the finish line approaches.
Enjoy the upcoming week, take care of each other, and keep searching for the passion.
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