“Nothing worse than a blind man getting blindsided.” JSM

 

Chapter Thirteen

Lucky

 

 

I’ve led two separate and exceedingly different lives.

The new life, and what I call the “old life”.

This new life is very recent. The old life is decades long and at this stage of life, it feels like a trillion years ago.

My first Valentine’s Day with Nancy, among other gifts bestowed, I wrote her a lengthy heartfelt poem, it made her cry, it made her friends cry and its now sitting in a keepsake box among other personal trinkets.

One of the lines in that poem, “I see life now through a different lens…” is pretty much my new motto. I see this world in a different way than the way it was perceived during the old life. I see people, places and things through a new, unscratched, unblemished and mostly clean lens. The lens isn’t perfect, but it’s more user friendly in the here and now, and I keep it close by at all times.

To any person reading this that wears glasses (having worn them myself since I was two). You know that wonderful sensation when the old pair is swapped out for the new, and even though it may be fuzzy and disorientating at first, when the focus is finally there and the eyes lock onto the perfect image you breathe in a sigh of relief, test out the immediate surroundings then venture outside to see the crisper, clearer, sharper, colorful environment?

It’s like that.

Once the old life was no more, the new life produced something unexpected.

As though my perspective was once a prisoner. Waiting and hiding chained up in a small treasure chest deep within the recesses of my subconscious. It took a major personal event to chisel open a tunnel and set that prisoner free.

I have a new found respect for topics that never before existed in my mind. I appreciate certain facets of this world now, more than ever. Much of what I was once blinded to in the past opened up to a better view; once the current journey started rolling its wheels. I read into things with a clearer focus. I recognize things for what they are. I see between the lines and I can observe my reality from multiple perspectives.

It’s simultaneously a blessing and a curse.

I also consider myself lucky as well. I’ve dodged many bullets over the years and a buddy once told me, “No, you don’t dodge bullets.  You dodge missiles.”

So I also consider myself lucky to an extent.

Perhaps… not luck. Maybe I correctly played the hand that was dealt me.  The only difference between coincidence and fate is perception.

*****

 The moment Bill met my eyes at the back of the auditorium, I had a choice to make. Either: engage, or don’t engage.  Luckily for me, it wasn’t my turn.  Bill had bigger fish to chat about.

The big man running the show stepped to the side of the stage and pointed down to his BizarroTech subordinate. Bill looked to the floor and snickered before he started his speech.

“Good morning everyone. I have a story for you.”  He spoke into the microphone and Gill stood above him in quiet patience. The big man nodded his head in agreement before my mentor even started speaking as though the leader had already heard the story.

“I met a nice couple, and I just knew we were about to make big things happen. The drive and will to change their lives opened up a wellspring of hope, and I foresee a future where they will be as successful as possible.  But how about I let them speak.  It’s always better to hear the story right from the source, right?  Thomas?  Will you and Holly please stand up and introduce yourselves and tell them the story they all want to hear?”

Thomas pushed himself from the chair and placed his palm on Holly’s shoulder. “Hi everyone, I’m Thomas, this is my lovely wife, Holly, and we’re honored to be here among you today.  We met Bill and Linda about six months ago and with their help, guidance, and ultimately taking my own life in a direction I never saw coming, we were able to pay down our debt, eliminate two credit cards and our revenue stream continues to climb. We constructed a sturdy base and all we needed to do was follow the guidelines and stay on the course provided, and we have attained Tier Two status in a matter of months.

The room clapped their approval of Thomas’ testimony. Gill looked to the ceiling overhead and clasped his hands together as though in prayer.

The projectors reactivated and each screen was smeared with testimonials from dozens of others who reached specific Tier levels throughout time.

Bill nodded his approval and Thomas sat back down with his wife.

At this point my mind raced, how many does Bill have here under his wing? So… Does Bill just drive around aimlessly and scour steel mills and construction sites for recruits to persuade?

I thought I was special.

Come to find out, no, not special. Just a potential link in a large chain.

Another stood and gave their testimonial followed by another and another and yet another and the room clapped and spoke in unison at the prompted moments and Bill’s eyes returned to mine.

I cut into his stare and shook my head. No. I don’t want to stand and testify.  Not what I signed up for.

He must have understood my unspoken message and handed the microphone back to the staff behind the scenes. My mentor sat back down at the front of the audience and Gill continued in his stead.

“Ladies and gentleman. My BizarroTech friends and family.  At this time I speak on our good friend Bill’s behalf.  We all understand that sharing isn’t always the most comfortable thing to do, but it helps provide a clearer picture.  We have a new member of our family sitting at the back who is having difficulties sharing, and the story is a good one.  What do we say about struggles?”

The room answered the question in unison, “The greatest struggles produce the best stories.”

“Through struggle comes success!”

The room again exploded with hooting and clapping and whistling and only one thought crisscrossed through my mind.

Bullshit.

 

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